Vampires and Donors guide to Negotiation

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Vampires and Donors guide to Negotiation

Postby deacongray » Tue Apr 18, 2006 6:49 pm

Vampires and Donors Guide to Negotiations


In every relationship there is a process, a time period when we learn about each other and what the expectations both parties hold for the relationship. The process for Vampires and Donors is no different then any other relationship, yet there are some questions and issues that should be discussed between the vampire and donor that are a little more complex.

The intent of this essay is not to tell you how to regulate or order your relationship. The point is to present to you a guide. This guide is basically a series of concepts, suggestions, and questions that could be used to help ensure that both parties are fully informed, kept safe, understand the expectations of each other, and the requirements and limitations that each side holds to be imperative to a successful relationship even in the short term. It’s a negotiation guide if you will.




Part one: Meeting for the Negotiation (new contact)

Set an established date, time and public place for meeting
Ensure meeting place will be appropriate and consider secondary meeting place
Contact trusted friend and inform of meeting information
Take a friend if possible
Designate safe call
Ensure that meeting is not considered a “Date”, or “Going out” as not to set expectations. If a follow on time of getting to know each other is proposed ensure the above are considered
Designate if Alcohol is acceptable for meeting ( I suggest not to allow it)

Meeting for Negotiation (familiar contact)
Set date, time and place for meeting
Ensure the meeting place is comfortable for the subject topic.
Ensure that the meeting and reason for meeting is the only subject matter at hand as not to confuse the meetings intent.


Part Two: Medical aspects for consideration

Discuss Blood Born Pathogens and proper blood testing
Make information about proper testing available
Discuss Health issues:
Illness that could contribute to injury: anemia, Hemophilia, Diabetes ECT...
Talk about medications one might be taking like blood thinners
Consider any mental or emotional disorders, and the treatment utilized if any
Discuss any allergies one might possess that are pertinent like latex, Iodine or Shellfish.

(Note: It’s is important to be sure that you are made aware of any physical or mental issues that could result in harm to either party. Proper health screening and pathogen testing is highly recommended.)



Part Three: Discovery (Personal info that needs to be shared)

Have you ever been implicated in, wanted for, arrested for, or convicted of a crime
If yes what Crime and what was the circumstances
Is the person married
Is the spouse aware of the activities
Can the spouse be contacted
Is there anyone that can be asked about your reputation in the community


Part Four: Expectations

Is a purely Monogamous relationship expected
Is the relationship simply for donations
What behavior is acceptable or not. (Like is it ok to have more then one donor, is it ok to have one donor and multiple lovers?
Will blood be stored
If stored is anyone else allowed to use it
What obligations are expected in the relationship?
What amount and how often are donations acceptable
Is there a mark or symbol of protection or responsibility
What information is considered confidential




Part Five: What Method to use

How will Psi feeding be conducted? (i.e.)
Physical contact
No physical contact
Astral connection

How is Blood Feeding to be conducted(i.e.)
Medical Blood Draw
Needle syringe
Sterile Knife
Scalpel
Lancet

How is Eros Type feeding to be conducted (sexual vampire) (i.e.)
1. Flirting only
2. Light physical contact no direct intercourse
3. Heavy physical contact no direct intercourse
4. Direct Intercourse
5. Passive observation


Part Six: I.C.E. and Aftercare

Who should be contacted In Case of Emergency (I.C.E)
Alternate contact
What is the method of aftercare? (Is the person given a band aid and sent home? Are they bathed and massaged? Are they taken shopping or to a show…basically how do you ensure that after the donor has given you want you desire, that they are taken care of and looked after until they are home safely or in the hands of another, OR positive assurance can be given as to the over all well being.)


Part Seven: Final considerations

Where will the donation take place
Who will be there
What is the address (if unknown)
Who will know
When will it take place





D


The Devil
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Postby The Madame X » Thu Apr 20, 2006 7:54 am

This is an excellent document to assist vamps and donors alike establish an understanding about the exchange. This is a great reaffirmation of some of the articles we have on the Crimson Circle under Instructions & Safety.

D, can you clarify:
Is there a mark or symbol of protection or responsibility…
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House Symbols

Postby deacongray » Thu Apr 20, 2006 8:21 am

I would be glad too!

I should write this out into an article all of its own but here is the short verson.

In noble houses of yeasterday the house had a coat of arms or a symbol that their members wore. It signified your allience but also who was responsible for you generally speaking.

So if I saw a young one being tormented by some one outside of the house, then I would offer protection. Individuals often had slight modifications of that symbol of symbols of their own inside the house that basically said "hey this person is with me...mess with them and your getting me by the horns."

As an example you might see a crossed swords with a HOD above the swords, then below it would be say in my case...D The Devil Or DTD


Thanks

D
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Postby The Madame X » Thu Apr 20, 2006 8:37 am

I see.
Very similar to welcoming a donor/Kitral/submissive/friend of the family as a Black Swan and giving them a mark (a piece of jewelry, ID card or ... a tatoo) that would indicate that they are an extended part of our family, and thus under our care and protection.

:)
Not very unlike what is being done in our family.
However we shy away from branding our black swans with our house insignia... but at this late hour and in my current spirit it seems like a nice idea...
What say you Lady Jane and Lorelaene?
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Postby deacongray » Thu Apr 20, 2006 11:38 am

Yep that sounds like it. My own slaves in the past wore a simple silver plated locket with a Old English D on it. Unless formally collared, then they had a Old English D fastened to the leash ring of their collar.
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Postby deacongray » Thu Apr 20, 2006 11:41 am

deacongray wrote:Yep that sounds like it. My own slaves in the past wore a simple silver plated locket with a Old English D on it. Unless formally collared, then they had a Old English D fastened to the leash ring of their collar.


I forgot to add in, that as part of a larger Organization I also had their symbol I wore, at the time anyway. Symbols are an important part of building community. In the case of a house that hold several indications. One being Loyalty to the House, Pride in the house, Pride in being accepted, And so on...


D
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Postby LadyJaneWelsh » Thu Apr 20, 2006 2:46 pm

It might be nice to have tattoos that can be added to as a person grows - black swan, dedicant, member... and so on. So if you found something that could grow with them, be added to, that could be nice. :)
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Postby deacongray » Thu Jul 13, 2006 5:31 pm

I mentioned this in another artical so I thought I would give it an old fashion


**Bump**
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Postby Aislin Ni MorRhiaghan » Sun Jul 16, 2006 6:31 am

This is very thorough Deacon. I'd like to repost this on VOS if possible as I feel that the community could certainly use something like this. There is a similar article there but one can never have too much common sense info.

I've considered getting a House emblem tattoo except that I really dislike needles. However, the symbols that I do wear never leave my skin. The symbols themselves are nothing more than twisted pieces of silver, however the meaning behind them is much more precious.

8)

Eternally,

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Postby deacongray » Sun Jul 16, 2006 10:51 am

I would be honored...I didn't honestly expect any real interest in this.


Thank you

D
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Postby Alterra Von Feuers » Mon Jul 17, 2006 7:45 am

I do agree with Aislin on this very important aspect Deacon! You can never have enough information and this one is carefully worded with every area of donation covered generously.
Thanks ~A
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Postby Hellkat » Tue Jun 05, 2007 2:47 am

I have always loved this piece of your Deacon
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