Donor Addictions and Vampyre/Donor Ethics

[Aislin Ni MorRhiaghan]

Donor Addictions and Vampyre/Donor Ethics

© Aislin Ni MorRhiaghan, January 2008

That vampyres must have donors is a fact of our lives. It is not something that we can forego as we crave their company, their friendship, their loyalty, and their sacrifice. Donors are indeed our most precious jewel as they comfort us as few others can and willingly offer us the life force we need. That we owe a huge dept of thanks and respect is also a fact of our lives.

Donors are those people within the Nightkind community who choose to willingly offer their life force be it through tantric, sanguine, or pranic draw. They are the most precious asset the Nightkind community has to offer and above all else they deserve our protection and to be informed of all dangers involved in allowing us to commune with them. Amongst these dangers is the danger of becoming addicted to the company, communion, and intensity of vampyres. Yes we are intense, few can deny that. Few can also deny that we draw people to us like moths to a flame. We have a charisma that is magnetic and an energy to match. Some become so enraptured that they become addicted to communion, sometimes even to the point of obsession.

Donor addiction occurs when donors are not fully prepared to deal with the intensity that a relationship with a vampyre offers. We are a passionate people and tend to also be over achievers in whatever goals we set for ourselves. Donors who are becoming involved with the Nightkind community for the first time may easily be swept off of his or her feet by the glamour, the passion, and this strange intensity that we wear. Donors who engage in communion with a vampyre for the first time are often hooked from the first sip (metaphorically speaking).

When vampyres commune with their donors they connect on several levels. Communion is almost like a lotus. It begins with the energy body, moves to the mental body, the emotional, the physical, and then the spiritual. All in all it forms an intense connection between the two that will have long lasting results and form bonds that are strong. The old saying do not invite a vampyre into your home is metaphorical for do not invite a vampyre into your body as your body is truly the temple that houses the true self, the soul.
This connection begins at first contact and will intensify as the relationship grows. Some donors are able to maintain a distance enough to prevent thrall and even to remain relatively unattached so that a friendly relationship between them is well established.

At the point of communion energy levels are exchanged. A vampyre who is experienced in energy working and manipulation knows how deeply he or she may feed from his or her donor without causing detriment. Likewise the donor should also be aware of their energy and shielding so that they have an above equal share of control in the feeding session. Different types of feeding have different types of connections and each should be aware of the effects they will have on both the vampyre and the donor. Most importantly donors should be chosen wisely. Physical health, emotional and mental stability should be the highest points on the list of characteristics. It is potently unethical to feed from anyone without their consent or regard to their total health and wellbeing. Those who are given easily to thrall, who are mentally or emotionally immature, or handicap in any way are not suitable donors. Vampyres should be aware of the signs of addiction as should donors so that the two do not interfere with an otherwise good relationship. Vampyres who are aware of addictions but continue feeding from those donors are unethical and should be disregarded.

Donor addiction often takes the form of deep and abiding need to be in the presence of a specific vampyre (or any of them) for the sake of validation. We offer a sense of imperviousness and empowerment that few can give. Oftentimes to these people the myth of the all powerful awe inspiring vampyre is enough to keep them going back for more. In this vein, it is the vampyre’s job to detect any slips or strays from reality that a donor may have and to inform of the truth minus any melodramatic additions. In addition to being addicted to the presence and energy of the vampyre in one sense they may also be addicted to communion as well.

Few of us could deny someone who needs help and if a person believes that the other person is suffering and will likely perish if they are not properly maintained, who could or would deny them help? The fact of the matter is that no vampyre has ever perished from lack of communion. This is an overly romantic myth to keep donors at our side, and one that no vampyre of any ethical standing should ever employ. It is base, deceitful, and dishonest. This isn’t to say that lack of feeding isn’t uncomfortable. It is without a doubt. Lack of comfort does not equal lack of life.








Communion offers an intimacy that mere emotional and physical intimacy can not. It temporarily elevates our senses, spirits, vibrations, and for a time it is deeply fulfilling. For some it is like a high that they can not enjoy just once in a while. For some it is a drive to commune over and over again in increasingly intense sessions until they reach a point where the need is more important than their own need for emotional stability and enforcement of personal boundaries both for theirself and their vampyre. The closeness that is felt is due to the close proximity, the intimacy involved, the energy exchanged, the perceived power, and the pheromones that are released during this time. When they all work together there is the illusion of deep emotional attachment. Addiction occurs when the donor’s boundaries have been altered to include any number of things that would not normally be acceptable and unsafe behavior and/or obsession occurs. In come cases donors who are addicted to communion are unable to function in normal relationships without it even to the point of engaging in fetish behavior (blood fetish usually) with non-vampyres to try to duplicate the same high that was achieved through actual communion.

Vampyres may also become addicted to the draw. Along with the initial pranic addiction (regardless of the type of communion), vampyres often feel a strong sense of power during the feed. For most vampyres control is of the essence and for others control is something entirely different. A vampyre with a control issue is as hazardous as a ravenous bull mastiff with rabies. For these vampyres, addiction is not necessarily from the actual act of communion. For the most part most vampyres draw from many types of energies. Not all are human. This branch of the addiction draws not from the actual feeding but from the power and control they receive from the act of feeding from a submissive donor. They become addicted to the perception of dominance even though the donor is the one wielding the power.




In a healthy vampyre donor relationship donors choose the draw method, the incision (if one is to be made) which in many cases is made by the donor, the length of feeding, and the conditions in which energy exchange is made. The position of the vampyre (if not performing a sanguine draw personally) is one that is the caregiver during and after the fact. It is the vampyre that must maintain energy levels, control over their hunger and feeding, provide healing and recuperation during and after the fact, and offer post communion care. They should form a symbiont circle in which both parties are the beneficiaries. At no point should it ever be one sided.

Blood, sex, and energy addiction are common issues. All of them carry their individual dangers and none are less hazardous than the other. Blood addiction is caused by biochemical reactions from the absorption of blood by the body. As the need for prana goes unchecked so does the need for blood. Blood addiction can be attributed to any type of fetish behavior that draws or utilizes blood (especially in personal relationships where blood play and sexuality are mixed) as a focal point. When feeding becomes not about satisfying the need for prana but about satisfying the desire for blood or the thrill of the drawing of the blood it becomes unhealthy. As the thrill demands more and more intensity, the need for the draw increases. This stems from lack of personal control which translates to a perception of power. The draw that is achieved is not merely from piercing the skin but also from piercing the psyche. It is not uncommon for donors who have an addiction to this type of draw to have issues with eating disorders or cutting, a history of emotional or physical abuse, lack of parental care, or general lack of attachment. Nor is it uncommon for vampyres who are addicted to this sort of draw to have a long history of violence to both humans and animals. In some cases autosanguination (drinking one’s own blood) is utilized when the addicted vampyre can not find a donor. This derives no prana whatsoever for the vampyre as we only need to feed when our prana is low, thus drinking blood that is already depleted is pointless. It is more of a placebo or visual stimulus than anything else. It satisfies the desire for blood rather than the utilization of it.

Sex addiction occurs when the validation of the person be they vampyre or donor is achieved only through their encounters. The donor continually seeks eros vampyres for communion and the vampyre continually seeks the ultimate communion. Sex addiction is rooted in the desire to give comfort and to receive personal validation of oneself. Unfortunately vampyres are notoriously reputed to be sex fiends. The metaphor of the vampyre itself in some psychological musings associate vampyres with forbidden sexuality and the need to be dominated. Thus donors and vampyres who become addicted to this type of communion do not do so from the need to feed. This is especially dangerous for those who have malformed boundaries between healthy emotional and sexual behavior and acceptability. Most donors who have an addiction to eros communion are likely to also have a history of emotional and sexual abuse, rape, cutting, depression, or instances in which emotional attachments were fleeting and few between.

Grazing is commonly used to describe random acts of feeding with random people without the benefits of health screenings or filters. Remember you are what you eat. If you ingest contamination you pollute your system. This includes unhealthy behaviors as well as they generally spawn unhealthy feeding habits.


Overall vampyre/donor addictions are forms of codependent relationships. Some things that may spawn from this type of relationship are stalking, abuse (on any level…verbal, emotional, physical, sexual etc), lack of personal boundaries, increasingly dangerous scenerios, lack of concern for the safety of the donor or the cattle mentality, a false sense of entitlement, and the detachment from reality as the donor often feels that the vampyre’s life is in danger and they are the only one that can help them.

A few signs to look for include but are not limited to:

• the inability to distinguish myth from reality
• the preference of myth to reality
• the proliferation of mythic stereotypes to enforce communion or manipulate the other person
• lack of consideration for the safety and well being of the donor
• lack of consideration for the safety and well being of the vampyre in the instance of blood and sex related illnesses in which multiple sources are sited at random intervals. This is why grazing is a poor idea for both parties.
• lack of control
• verbal, emotional, physical, sexual abuse. And on this note I must interject before continuing. No one…say this with me…has the right to maltreat you regardless of who they are, who they think they are, who they think they were 300 hundred years ago, etc. If you’re a donor in an abusive relationship…you are not cattle. You are precious and deserve to be treated as such. If someone is abusing you leave. They do not have your best interest at heart and despite their belief they are not entitled to maltreat you. You are not their property.
• Lack of emotional or mental maturity
• Lack of discipline
• A history of abusive or violent relationships, suicides, fatalities etc
• Lack of personal relationships or the ability to maintain them
• an addiction to vampyre related fiction
• an addiction to dangerous behavior
• disregard for community standards of behavior or the tenets of community
• disregard for law in general
• a history of cutting, self inflicted abuse, animal cruelty, child abuse, depression, suicidal behavior or thoughts, a continual involvement with dangerous people or situations.
• Scarring from cuts
• Sudden and intense susceptibility to thrall
• History of substance abuse

An honorable mention should be made of the danger of adrenaline addiction. For some feeding their vampyre is a huge adrenaline rush, especially for those who use sanguine draw. There is a danger there that adds to the attraction. Adrenaline is a big component of addictions as it gives a thrill to an otherwise normal activity. For those who live a very banal life, being involved with a vampyre can be extremely thrilling. Be sure that your donor is knowledgeable about why you have to draw from them. They should be as up to date on safety and health precautions as you are. Do not romanticize this need. Too many have done that already.

Addictions are hard to break. They are not impossible. In the meantime you must maintain your life and your health on all fronts as you alone are responsible for those things. It is your life that will be negatively or positively affected by the people you choose to bring into it and allow to stay within it. If you are in an abusive donor/vampyre relationship, leave. If at any point you feel that you are being fed upon against your will, leave. If you feel that you have been enthralled you are likely right. Again, get out of the situation. A vampyre should not have to enthrall a donor in order to satisfy their need. Whether you are vamp or donor if you need help, get it. There is no shame in improving your life and the lives of those around you.

[RavenHarte]

Again WONDERFULLY DONE. Thx for posting

[deacongray]

Yes as always you manage to pull off an amazing piece.