Vetting Our Donors

[deacongray]

Vetting Our Donors
Deacon Gray

I have found a few different types of Donors/ Black Swans out there.
The ones I call true Black Swans are very unique and special. It is
not just their energy, but also their whole mind set.

Many out there donate for the wrong reasons, looking for love,
looking for unrealistic emotional support, or just plain loneliness.
People want to belong often, and some will do what ever they think
it will take in order to get that feeling. That doesn’t mean that all Donors are out there for those reasons, or that those reasons in themselves cannot be a part of the why they want to become donors.

One of the things I really support is really vetting would be donors.
·
Look at their emotional, and mental well being. If a person is not stable, than it is more than just their energy that can be an issue, it can be their overwhelming needs that can become nearly vampiric on their own accord.
· Get a real look at their friends, their lives, I find that if a person does not really seem to have their own social connections, they tend to not be able to sustain them. If they cannot handle surface level relationships, than handling the deeper commitment of a Donor/ Black Swan with a vampire could be a real struggle on both parts. Such relationships are very intense, powerful in their connections, and a long-term relationship with a donor has to be well founded if it is going to succeed.

· What kind of hobbies they have. Why would it matter if they have good healthy hobbies? Well again it shows a certain amount of emotional security and independence. If someone has as their main hobby surfing porn sites…they might not be what you are looking for.

· What is the condition of their financial well being as opposed to aspiration? What I mean by that is not how they are doing, but what they have done and are doing to ensure their own well being (regardless of the economy.) Not everyone wants to be a millionaire, not every one is unhappy living a simple life, and there is nothing wrong with that.

Of course this is not a checklist, and no one thing I mentioned is really going to give you a clear picture of the person. Some things we just have to learn by spending time, really talking and learning about each other.

So “Why go to such extremes”? Well sure there are quick donors out there, but most of us vamps are look for long-term donors. We are looking for people with stable energy, not a chaotic energy pool of emotional dysfunction. True “Black Swans” that we can have a real relationship with on more than a basic simple level that just makes the donors simply food. This does not mean they are sexual relationships, but it does lend to some level of trust, loyalty, and friendship that transcends a simple Vamp/ Donor bond.

This is why most vamps will tell you that they do not see their
donors as food, but as companions, friends, sometimes lovers, but
always at our side if not physically, than at lest spiritually. It’s a disposition that we happily share with them.

Deacon Gray
House of The Dreaming

[Alterra Von Feuers]

Very well written Deacon !The points made of a possible donors self reliance and confidence should always be in the forfront .Any realtionship ,be it friendship to something more intimate needs to be analized enough to be sure that person is stable and solid.

Even average friendships can become a headache when the 'friend ' has uncontrolled issues beyond the average day to day things we deal with.

One other donor that might be best to avoid (But seriously tempting ) is the thrill seeker , one that has a rather misconstrued view of a Vamp.Often mixing it up with the hollywood version, they live a bit in another dream world that often is not entirely healthy. Thier dayside life may seem fine and they are on control. They want to loose that, sometimes to a dangerous level .Just as the adrenaline junkie will push the limit for that thrill.So will this donor to escape the mundane world around them and try forsomething fantastical. You might want to lease your beast around one of these

~A

[LadyGigiFrost]

I have not had a donor, but what I can say in speaking to vampires and donors is this:
So many do not even know about the Donor Bill of rights or even a Donor contract.
All to many times the vampires I have spoken to have serious issues with there donors being reliable (flaky). In asking the vampire, do you have a donor contract? they have said no. How do you know this donor there a friend?

I have nicely suggested that they may want to reevaluate that donor and even possible even that friendship, and look into donor rights and contracts.

[VodalokNightkiller]

long before there was one online to look too, I always made a list of rules that i and my donors would agree too. it would according to the donor change is small ways to suit their needs. its a sign of respect, and it has the effect of building trust, and the very bond that Deacon speaks of. a donor that does not trust you, can make you sick with the blood or energy you take from them.